Friday, August 17, 2012

Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue.

Have you ever wanted to just WRITE?? No vision no path no inspiration but just write to see where you might go with it? Yeah Me too! ..

My life has been an adventure!!

So lets skip the Oh so tragic 0-20 years of my life.. I got married.. Young. Age 20.. I loved it.. It was for the most part Amazing and I wouldn't have complained much if I stayed married..I gained 2 amazing little Men out of that marriage. My sons.  They are exactly what I needed.. YAY.. In fact.. in this marriage I would have lived day in and day out Just Doing.. Just being.. Just.. being Just...I'm grateful that we actually openly discussed getting divorced because then I finally woke up to the realization that I WAS Just being Just and said.. YES Let's let go and move on to better ourselves. We didn't tell too many people at first then the oh yeah Facebook had to tell the rest... I'm still getting stragglers saying WHAT??? You're divorced?? When did that happen.. ??? It happened 12 years and 2 months exactly after we were married!

I dated a handful of people after my divorce because I felt like if I didn't jump into dating I wouldn't Ever!!.. I was scared that I would mess it all up.. cuz after divorce EVEN WHEN you are friends when it ends.. there are still moments when you're down and where you blame yourself and where you miss your partner.. Yup even me. Matt was just fine.. but I bet he had his moments too. I guess he was ready to move on.. he found someone quicker than both of us imagined and they are VERY Happy!! YAY!! I'm so happy for him..truly.. I thought the same thing for me.. Oh man I thought YES ME TOO!! I started to date a man named Chris.  In fact he was a great man.. I dated him and felt HORRIBLY confused when I felt an overwhelming feeling to break up with him.. (Devastation hit HARD) WHAT??? WHY??? I can say that I felt absolute love for him. And he felt the same.. Ok now what?? I'm alone again and worried and then felt.."yup no more love in my life".. I guess I'm not ready for it.. which is ok.. I'm in no hurry.. BUT I guess my creator had different ideas.. An old friend of mine I recently heard had gotten a divorce nearly a year ago.. and now.. it's been nearly 3 months after my Divorce and I just happened to talk with him.. we went to lunch to catch up.. he heard about my break up. He had even a couple weeks before, meet Chris and was truly happy for me.. and I was happy for him moving on and he too had a girlfriend. After talking to him, I found out he as well had an overwhelming feeling to break up with the girl he was seeing.. (sounds like a theme going on here) WHAT?? No way!! Well still we didn't get excited about that but we started talking more.. we could understand where we both were coming from.. and we seriously didn't run out of things to talk about. That was actually really nice.

We started seeing each other as often as we could. Could this be?? Could my friend actually be interested in Me? Weird.. I was starting to get interested in him.. Really???? WOW.. Each day we would make arrangements to see each other. We went Day camping with my sons.. It felt normal. I've known him for nearly 4 years and my boys knew him and things felt natural. We laughed we talked all hours of the night.. we kept seeing each other.. Then we realized that we were SEEING EACH OTHER!! Oh the first time he and I called each other boyfriend and girlfriend.. HA.. So fun.. and felt so right!! Of course we were. It was so natural it was where we were supposed to be. And because of his work schedule at the time it left A LOT of time that we could spend together. When I would have my boys during the day we would  all go on outings and go on walks go to the park and go shopping even.. Make lunches and dinners together.. and even the occasional sleep over..  OH MY GOODNESS!! This is Right!! We both felt it.. WE both wanted this never to end.. Just KEEEP GOING!!! Yes... Please an Thank you!! Such a Gentleman! We would imagine our lives together forever!.. Then as we were eating our favorite snack at a park (cucumbers and cheese) we lay there with the sun kissing our skin and faces we said to each other what do you think? Should we get married? I mean why not?? (OH WAIT I JUST ENDED A MARRIAGE 5 Months ago.. )  YES I think we should.. I wanted him.. he wanted me.. we wanted to be together. So.. that being said.. we giggled over it.. and moved on.. and it again came up.. and again we felt strongly about it.. WEIRD!! But Awesome!!  we started looking for rings.. just for fun.. I realized I didn't want a Diamond.. I wanted my favorite stone of all.. The Garnet.  We found the perfect ring.. He ordered it.. Oh my goodness.. :D It came to him in the mail.. and he wanted me to see it.. it was perfect and beautiful and exactly what I wanted.. sorta medieval-ish... Perfect!!

I tried it on... but kept my eyes closed so I couldn't see it on my finger.. So when he asks me.. at THAT Moment would be the first time I see it there.. and he said.. "It's exactly right".. I took it off and he put it away..

Weeks passed.. and it was now the end of the month in July .. the 29th day of the year 2012..  I was having just one of those down days.. as we all get.. Joe had to work but he asked if he could come and get me and make me dinner that night and go on a walk.. YES  PLEASE.. :D  I was in need of getting out..  So he made some flat bread from scratch.. (OH he's so good at that) and then I cut up some Cucumbers and really good mozzarella Cheese and drizzled it in olive oil and Balsamic Vinegar with a dash of salt and pepper.. One of our Favorite snack.. seriously!!  On our walk up City Creek Canyon we picked apples off some trees hanging over the sidewalk and even some Grapes.. they were Amazing! We walked maybe a mile up the creek.. Through the water over the rocks and then I saw the perfect place.. Let's eat There!! There was a tree trunk that had fallen and it was huge.. Perfect.. with the water right there.. oh and what looked like a little Green fairy-glade Cove in the water.. it was Sooo fairytale-ish  after I was done eating I walked and ducked under the tree branches to get into that cove that looked so awesome.. and Joe started cleaning up a bit from the food and he said he'll be right there.. Ok.. I was in awe with the water flowing and the occasional dog running along the trail with their owners and sometime the occasional walker/biker.. the smell of the water and the blossoms and Green all around me.. My day had turned around and I was in heaven.. Joe finally came and ducked underneath to join me.. and I looked up.. the sun was just going down and the sky was Bright orange/Pink and Bright blue.. I almost gasped.. and pointed up to show the beautiful sky to Joe.. as I looked from him back up into the sky he raised his hand and in it  was a piece of twine with The Ring tied upon it.. I Gasped again.. out of shock and Awe!! He right then and there said.. Evana .. Will you Marry Me? I said.. NOTHING nothing was coming out!! All I could do is Stare and he quickly said you don't have to say yes.. And then I couldn't stop Nodding.. nodding nodding.. still nothing came out of my mouth.. he then knelt down in the water.. and fianlly I could speak and said YES.. Yes of course!!! I love you Joseph!!  He smiled and put the Ring on my finger!! He came up out of the water off his knee and kissed me ...then the tears fell from my eyes... I am Engaged!!

Is it too soon?? Well for he and I... no.. for the world Probably.. But.. who gives the Timelines to things? Who has the right to say when it's too soon or when it's just right or not soon enough? This isn't his or my first time.. No.. this isn't something that I know nothing about.. but this is the most romantic and magical and most perfect time for me and for Joe. I have fallen in love with an amazing man. Are we without our faults? No.. Neither one of us are.. But I am truly in love with him. I like that we know what to expect and that there is going to be new things that we didn't expect.. we know that we learn and grow from our experiences.. but I know that I'm here to work hard to make our lives together Even BETTER than what we can imagine and even better than what we've had and we look forward to our dreams coming true together.

SO you may be wondering if there is a Date set.. Yep.. there is.. We are Eloping!! Why??? Because it's not about our friends and families being there.. Of course I love you all..  of course you're welcome to come but we are doing a bit of traveling to go make it even more special for us. I love your support sure but support us on our decision to make this Marriage for us! There is less for everyone to think/worry about.. we don't need a big fancy wedding.. we just need Love from you all. Smile in knowing that we are happy..